Real Talk: The Theory About Giving A Fuck

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My friend Terez likes to text me before bed to tell me that he woke up with one fuck today and he is going to bed with one fuck at the end of it - zero fucks given.

I have a theory. A theory about fucking. No, not about that kind of fucking. 

I have a theory about giving a fuck...

The older we get, the more times we are disappointed. The more times we give a fuck when we aught not give a fuck, which leads to us finding ourselves in the bottom of our bathtubs with the shower running and mascara leaking down our checks wondering why the fuck we gave a fuck.

You follow?

This leads us to be sparing with our fucks. We look at a situation through the jaded eyes of someone who doesn't want to waste another good mascara day on something that isn't worthwhile. 

But, my theory is this - sometimes we take it overboard and we don't give enough of a fuck. Alarming thought, I know. 

Bear with me here - recently I was reading "The Life-changing Art of Not Giving A Fuck," when it hit me. Picking your fucks is where it's at.

Meaning, instead of leaning towards either side, it makes the most sense to evaluate on an ongoing fucking basis (yes, I know this is something that people probably intuitively know... but I didn't... so maybe you didn't).

It's the concept of looking at what is worth getting upset over. 

Is it worth getting upset about something that you know isn't going to work out before you even start it? No. Is it worth getting upset over something that you poured your heart and soul into? Yes.

Is it worth getting upset over your friends boyfriends friend who was sort of a dick at that party when he could have just been nice? No. Is it worth getting upset that the trip you have been looking forward to got cancelled? Yes.

So, the fucking theory is this. 

Picking your fucks wisely is the way to lead a satisfying life.

Not too hot, not too cold, just right.